I feelb like the only time I am not hungover is when I am drunk

I cant

I can not get myself to stop thinking about you. I just get so happy when I see you I love your inperfectios make you so perfect, the way you play with your hair. The way you look so effortless you don't seem to walk but to float, I love your accent the moles on your back, I love the way you always seem to be fucked up but you make it look cool...

When I was I kid I stole $200 dollars from my moms purse she blamed the housekeeper, 15 years later I want to tell her but I fell she still would get mad at me

At night

Last night when I saw the girl I like I just kept on thinking how nice would it be to go dowm on her and if she is a moaner or a screemer

Sorry is not personal but I'd rather masturbate than have sex with you

!!

I joined a dating site and found one of my bosses profile and it says "looking for black man only"

I think that if i give my brother gifts that reminded him of our childhood that one day he will remember that i am his sister and that i live 3 miles away. 

Please!

Come to the party tonight! I need to make my ex jealous.

.

I don't mind using the urinals until I saw in one a white guy with a dick bigger than mine..,